![](https://expeditionhappinessandtheartofwandering.wordpress.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/01/camper.jpeg?w=790)
What a concept, huh? You get this one, precious life… and you also get to decide how to live it. So, how exactly do you go about doing that?
Since making this leap, a lot of folks have either said “I am so jealous,” or “How were you able to do that?” And so, I want to share the journey. Because that journey is a lot like what happens when you look at Instagram pics… they look amazing, but you don’t see the different attempts at angles, lighting, filters or any of the mayhem that was happening in the background. I have always, and will always be honest in my journeys, and the path to getting there is no different.
Also, fair disclaimer- my journey and adventure to this point may not look like yours or what you envision. Take this with a huge grain of salt. And perhaps a margarita.
The time was January of 2019. We were on a dog hike. It was cold. Bitterly cold, lots of snow, wind and cold. I said that already, but it was fucking cold. I said to Justin “I cannot wait for spring and summer.” That sentence came out of my mouth every single day for the next couple of months. I dreamed of wearing shorts and flip flops- and the concept of being warm without 145 layers of clothing on seemed so foreign.
Fast forward to April. I knew I needed to take a mental break. Like a serious mental break. The weight of life was too much. It was on another hike that Justin and I had a chat of sorts that went something like this:
“Babe, I think I need to take a leave. I am just so overwhelmed and unhappy and I just need time.”
“Well, if you take a leave, maybe we should sell the house. You can take time to start packing and stuff.”
Sell the house. Sell the house. Sell the house. But I LOVED that house. We had done so much work renovating it, loving it, getting married in the back yard… There were so many great memories in the 7 years we lived there. I knew we didn’t use even 70% of it, it was a lot of work to clean, I hated doing yard work, and oh- there is this little thing called “work” that we had to do a lot of to pay the mortgage, heating/cooling, gas and all of the stuff to keep it running. But, it was our first home and it was ever so special to me. I just wasn’t ready (I was, but I wasn’t- if that even makes sense).
Off I went on a mental journey to wellness from May until September. And it was incredible. I was truly able to sort through myself and “come back.” A funny thing happened during that time. I was able to clearly see what had been in front of me the whole time. During my leave, all I could focus on was myself. I couldn’t log into anything work related (not that I wanted to- but I couldn’t even if I did). I spent a lot of time not at our house. We camped and traveled and enjoyed life. And I loved it. I realized that I didn’t miss our home while we were gone. I realized I was living a life without a lot of the “stuff” I owned, and I didn’t miss it- or even think about it. I also realized that I really didn’t like my job. (Here is a quick side bar- though I didn’t love my job, I loved the people. And also, my job was really easy. And flexible, and probably all of the things people want in a career- but not me. Also, anyone who has spent a collective 15 minutes with me would be able to figure that out.) Anyhow, I really started thinking about the chat my husband and I had months before, and like a switch, this all seemed possible. And necessary.
So, here is where it all began.
First, the “purge” began and didn’t stop for a while. Take a second from reading this. Look around your home. What, of the things you have, do you need actually need? What are you keeping because you have just always had it? And, why? QUICK. Tornado is coming… what do you grab? That is how it all started. We began going through things and asking, why? And if it couldn’t be answered, off it went. PS I really cannot remember any of the things we got rid of. So, it truly wasn’t that important.
Ok, cool. So you purged your house. Now what? Well, of course you have to create a plan. This is where you ask yourself what you want. Do you want to simply downsize and live where you do? Do you want to bail from a home-living life completely? Change your name and move to Belize? Write it down. That part helps to figure out how you are going to get there. Write out the big plan (anyone who has ever worked in a business knows about SMART planning… Specific Measurable Actionable Realistic and Timely, this is the perfect place to enact that). We will get to the details in a minute. It is also important to be realistic. Realistic in a couple of ways. Is your partner on board (if you have one)? Do you have kids? Are they on board? Do you have pets? Can they come? (The answer to that is yes, by the way) 🙂
Great. You have a loose idea of what you want in this life of yours. Now you have to figure out the deets. The nitty gritty. If you are like us, getting rid of your home means you REALLY have to pare down. We kept a bunch of furniture and sentimentals only because we plan to have a residence (though wayyyyy smaller) in some way shape or form, and don’t want to spend a bunch of pesos later buying all of this stuff again. Our timeline was flexible, but because winter was approaching, we had a bit of a fire under our rumps- so it went like this.
September:
– Get the house “sale” ready. And put it on the market. Part of this meant going through items and selling or donating (helllooooo facebook marketplace!!!) stuff that we needed to get rid of to stage the house.
– Let my boss know my intentions. We were getting ready to go into the holiday season, and in retail that is the busiest time of year. This was a slippery conversation though- what if it all fell through? I just always thought that being honest and transparent would be the best bet, no matter what.
– Get everything squared away with the dogs. What do they need? Mika and her epilepsy was something we needed to really think about… so we built in places to stay that were close to major universities for her to go to in an emergency. All vaccinations done, all meds filled- for as long as they would let us. Heartguard, tick meds… everything.
– Get all doctor appts figured out for us too. I was going from full-time to part-time, so I especially needed to get this done.
– Research a home on wheels. We had a camper, but it was absolutely too small for full-time living, and a bit too old for us, so we researched and researched until we found “the one.”
October:
– Everything became real when we sold the house. And anyone who has sold a house, knows all of the things that go with that. Inspection, more cleaning and purging, real packing starts
– Oh, and with the real packing comes the real emotion that this is really happening. So there are tears, and happiness and sadness and everything in between. But, when you are moving to a destination unknown, it is even more sad. Probably because of the uncertainty, or maybe it’s just me. For as exciting as all of this was, getting real is when it gets scary. Now, of course, it paid off, but I imagine it to be when you finally decide to sky dive. It’s super exciting to think about and think about the accomplishment when you are done, but dear lord in heaven do thoughts go through your mind in the airplane on the way up there, and most certainly when you toe the line to jump. Once you jump though, it’s pure elation. Anyhow, this was a time of a lot of packing and sweet Pete, a LOT of trips to Goodwill and the like just getting rid of stuff. I think Justin and I said at least twice a day to each other, “how did we get all of this shit??” Sidebar: This can be scary for everyone involved. And it means you may have feelings that you take out on those you love. Just be aware of that, and try to stay positive.
– We got the camper and planned as we packed. What was going into storage? What needed to be stored at Justin’s parent’s house (i.e. things that couldn’t get too cold)? And what was going to come with us? This wasn’t just packing. We had sections for boxes. And the boxes were labeled in detail.
– Then came mail. Where was it going to go? Thankfully, we were able to forward everything to Justin’s mom. And, USPS has informed delivery, where they show you everything you are going to get in the mail. SUPER helpful- especially since Mary made a couple mail dumps, and I knew exactly what was coming.
– Then came the address. We were moving from Minnesota to ? But we needed a permanent address for our new licenses and plates. THAT, my friends, was a journey. But, we got it figured out. Additional side note- you have no idea how far being nice will get you. Yes, even at the DMV. After we got an actual address, we had to update all of our credit cards and important places to get mail. And, make every single thing that we could paperless. Both for the environment and convenience. We were able to e-sign our loan documents so we didn’t need to get stuff done in person. This digital era sure is a time to be alive- make sure you research all of that, and what options you have.
– We also had to coordinate the closing on our home with when we were leaving MN (this meant we had to close early on our home, about 2 weeks early). Thankfully, we were able to stay at Justin’s grandma’s house for a week until we were set to head down. We needed to do this because we had 2 cars, and needed a truck to haul the camper. So, Justin sold his truck to a dealership, paid off his loan… I tried, but it wasn’t going to happen (and trying to figure out a truck for a 5th wheel on top of all of this was just too much). So we kept my Tahoe for the time being. This also meant we needed to figure out how we were gonna get the camper to our RV park. Enter UShip. It is an amazing platform that allows you to post what you need hauled and people can place bids. We found someone who was absolutely awesome. It is all bonded and insured, and it was cheaper than what we would have paid in gas. This gave us more time to figure the truck situation out. And, as we would later learn, this came with benefits and downfalls.
– Where were we gonna go? Well, in some still-to-be-determined way, we landed on Tennessee. But, that is about as far as we got. We had no idea until we were driving through Kentucky where we were actually going to stay. This is not how I recommend, or plan to do things in the future. It was just a lot of change and mayhem, so we had no other real choice. With all of the change and mayhem came a brain that just got overwhelmed, for each of us. So it kept getting pushed to “tomorrow,” and we all know the rest of THAT story. This also meant that we had to find and check out the RV park before the hauler came with our home. It was stressful because we had never been, didn’t know anything about where we were going or what to expect, or if they even had availability. Plus, we were driving through the mountains with no cell phone service.
I think though, that what I really want to say this. You build the life you want, and it all just sort of comes together. Did things work out the way we thought they would? Sort of. Some things were an absolute dream, and some an absolute mess. The stuff that went well we high-fived on and the stuff that didn’t, well we had no choice but to work through it. So I think the best advice I can give is this… Have a plan but no plan. Meaning, have a loose idea of what you want to do, get organized with what needs to be done, check it off as you go, and let go. Enjoy the process for what it is- focusing on what needs to be accomplished, but also for what is to come.
Like I mentioned before, it is very stressful, but you have to keep that in mind with your spouse, kids, pets, family, work etc. You just have to keep focusing on what you can accomplish and control, and work through the rest. Please trust me on this. The next thing you know, you are in the very place you want to be, and life has a completely different meaning. All of the sudden it all comes together, and you look back on the journey and just laugh, thinking “what a crazy ride, but here we are.” And that, my friends, is worth it’s weight in gold.
Cheers, and keep wandering, my friends!
Nikki
#MeyersGoMobile #ExpeditionHappinessAndTheArtOfWandering